As I sat down to write this article after praying I glanced down at my fingers resting on the keys of my little red laptop. My eyes glanced at the tiny silver ring that wrapped around my ring finger. I have had this ring since I was 13. It’s a purity ring. Inscribed on the silver are three simple and life changing words. “True Love Waits”. The entire time I wore this ring up until 4 days ago I always thought that it meant you save your first kiss for your wedding day or you save your sexual purity for your wedding night. (And in a way it does mean that, but I came to realize that it has a double meaning as well!) Four days ago I thought long and hard about what the words really mean.
God gently revealed to me that what “True Love Waits” really means is that you love your future spouse enough to trust your future and your hopes and dreams into God’s all powerful and sovereign Hands. You love your future spouse enough to wait patiently for him and in the mean time, surrender your desires and longings to Jesus for protection. It can be hard to let go of your future and slip it into the hands of an unseen God. But, the unseen God is not an unknown God. He is the perfect Daddy. The most amazing guardian and the best friend a girl could ever ask for.
When we worry about our future, it is in fact an act of distrust in God. We are secretly unhappy and discontent with where God has us and with what He has us doing. And that is defying Him and His plan for you. Believe me, the moment you let go of your will and the way you want things to be, God will bless you. He will open so many more doors to unknown blessings than you ever thought possible.
Corrie ten Boom wrote the most amazing quote in her book once. She says, “Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.” ― Corrie ten Boom, Clippings from My Notebook
Not trusting God and worrying about the future opens doors to discontentment and unguarded thoughts. As girls, we can come up with so many romantic notions. We can plan the man we want to marry. We can picture the way he asks us on our first date. We can even plan what type of character, facial expressions and style he will have (Come on, you know you do it).
But God has the perfect man picked out for you.
When He was creating your future husband in his mother’s womb, God was thinking of you. And when God was creating you, He was thinking of all the ways that you would complete your future beloved and vice versa. Sometimes the men we meet or who God has planned for us since the beginning of time are the total opposite of the guy that we had created in our mind. That’s why it is so dangerous to make our own plans. We might miss out on God’s best for us because all we can think of is what we want, what we need, and what we have dreamed of all this time.
I love this quote, it’s so true: “Don’t compare your Love Story to those you watch in movies. They’re written by scriptwriters. Yours was written by God.” -Unknown
So, you’re waiting to fall in love, get engaged, go on dates and hopefully marry the man of your dreams. So far, maybe that hasn’t happened. You’re still waiting and time is still ticking. Day to day life becomes boring and monotonous and you wonder if you will ever get to experience the love that so many movies and Facebook relationships portray. I know exactly how you feel because I’ve had the same thoughts and feelings that every Christian “single” girl has had.
But I have realized something (Or rather God has revealed it to me), I’m going to let you in on a secret. Ready? –> You don’t have to sit around wondering about, dreaming of and planning for the day you will fall in love and begin a relationship with someone. God can use you in any area of your life, including your years of singleness. Just think of Mary-she was preparing her whole life (unawares) for her calling to be the mother of Jesus. What about Ruth? After her husband died, she was single and living with her mother in law! She got busy and went to work to serve and bless Naomi instead of mourning and waiting around for when her life would begin again. God blessed her with an awesome man of God! It was the same with Esther, Rachel, and Rebecca. Read their stories in the Bible.
All this to say that while you’re single, you could be preparing for your life as a future wife. Start learning about how to take care of the bills, shopping, making appointments, cooking, and cleaning, ect. Fill your life with things that take your eyes off of yourself and your circumstance and surround yourself with encouraging friends. You can choose to pine over the day that you will meet the Mr. Awesome, or you can allow God to use you for His glory. Let go of your longings and desires and let Him mold you and shape you into the woman you were destined to be from the very beginning.
By staying busy you are crowding out the thoughts of doubt, discontentment and romanticized dreams that will ultimately hurt you and your future husband.
Girls, I would like to present a challenge for you. Let’s call it The True Love Waits Challenge. Here it is:
Place a stack of pretty paper next to your bed tonight. Every morning when you wake up, take a piece of paper and write down one Godly character quality on it. A few examples would be “Patience, Honor, Humility, Forgiveness, Grace, Nobility, ect.” Write it down on your paper and pray that character quality over your life AND over your future husband’s life.
(A fun idea would be to take a picture of the paper with your phone and upload it to your favorite social network with the hashtag #TrueLoveWaitsChallenge *example pictured below*)
By doing this, you are surrendering your time, your dreams and hopes of the future to God and learning and growing through your time of being single. It’s all in your thoughts and state of mind! Don’t think about being “single” as a bad thing! It’s a beautiful time of it being just you and God and no one else to interrupt your time with Jesus! 😉
Let’s start challenging each other to a higher standard of living by choosing joy instead of sorrow, contentment instead of discontentment, and surrender instead of free will. God will see your heart and your efforts as “pleasing and acceptable in the sight of the Lord”. Don’t give up on doing good.
Sure waves of discontentment and fear of the future will creep in but you can battle them in the strength of Jesus. You can fight, and you WILL WIN! If you accepted The True Love Waits Challenge then comment below! I look forward to your responses. God bless!
“Don’t excite love. Don’t stir it up until the time is ripe and you are ready.” Song of Solomon 8:4
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